Commodity Limericks

A limerick is a five-line poem with a strict form, originally popularized in English by Edward Lear. Limericks are frequently witty or humorous, and sometimes obscene with humorous intent.

The following example of a limerick is of anonymous origin.

The limerick packs laughs anatomical
In space that is quite economical,
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

Here are some commodity limericks ,I did it in a hurry when i get the time will compile and write more.possibly better ones than this
Meanwhile if you do get creative and can think of some commodity limericks feel free to write to me will publish it here.

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After engineering got to become a commodity trader,
started well, made money and in just a month became a team leader,
Met with a lot of women who liked young guns,
Wild time all weekend nights not with nuns,
Got up one day to find out that markets have made me badder,

Those days with em chicks went to china to see the great wall,
tried impressing em by dancing on it and avoiding the fall,
at hangzhou for breakfast and shanghai for lunch,
at Guangzhou for supper and Hong Kong for Brunch,
Till the broker said "buddy pay up" , you got a variation margin call.



Exotic OTC options and a new pitch , make a million with just a cent,
Wow lot of business and now without the regulators scent,
so ran the model on commodities like guar gum, soya and cereal,
Had clients and agrements signed in continous seriels,
Screamed the regulator"inducement try it once more to tihar you will be sent"

Decide to bet bear on Sydney wollen futures,heard that this time real horny ewes,
Running around the meadows and fields like bollywood heroines behind Yews,
Waited for bloombergs aussie consensus estimate census,
The number came out and blew me out of my senses,
Unlike bollywood heroines, if not mated during "season" for ewes it is of no use!

Went for a holiday to the beautiful south american country of Chile,
Let me bet that up it will go the price of Guntur Chili,
Prayed that with me will be the Roman Goddess Ceres,
on lower freeze on NCDEX and as usual for me a losing series,
Oh the thought of not having put a stop loss yet again makes me feel silly!


This time on the Sheiks oil I bet waiting for the EIA to give me a cue,
I get it right this time near Richmond i will build my house facing the lovely Kew,
A golf course and a beautiful lake with a natural dam,
Listened to the data and cursed yet again "Damn",
This time with my lawyer I got to face a bigger queue.

So with no more clients left met uncle and asked him to cite,
he thought deeply and then said with a bit of foresight,
I know you are now broke and have to pay your credit card dues,
with my reference for your client you have some donts and dos,
Be honest with him and dont lie because he is the owner of the krishnampettai site,

Looked at the account statement and almost got a flu,
Took out the marlboro lights and smoked it like a flue,
Oh god as a commodity trader my career is done.
When the mafia client sees he is going to dun.
Oh god like that eagle i wish I Flew.


Once at 253 analysed and said I will buy coffee,
El nino is coming ,winning trade so pass me the toffee.
The technical analyst checked the chart called me on phone and said,
Looks to be over bought, rsi 85 so get off the bed,
At 1845 when new york opened the margin account that was a 100k gone in a jiffy.

Nothing to worry just a few more days afterall there is a santa claus,
and what else can the mafiose do the agreement has all the safety clause,
said his aide, take enough food so that you will not be weak,
and definetly be safe away from him atleast for a week,
The long ones in his hands are not nails but claws.

Front seats at the Cricket match thanks to that reuters relationship Belle,
Thought will go back to trading just before the opening bell.
After seeing sachins knock thought will get in some beer,
Forgot that mafia client who sends his clients to the bier,
Called him and said coffee sorry,for which he said "SOB going to hang uou down that Indian Thorn Bel".



Cheers